how can no-self want to get out of self though? obviously, it can't. can it? why would it want to?

me, i, my ego does not want to be a lie anymore. yet, my ego IS the lie. so what's more important (to me), not being a lie or self-preservation? not being a lie is definitely more interesting. that's why it's so hard to get to the bottom of this stuff, because your brain is wired not to even THINK about anything that could lead to its death. which is why you have to force yourself to do it.

let's just say, that at this point, i really know nothing about no-self. not really, anyways. but i do know about my self. so i've got to get out of this madhouse.

i've got to get out of myself.

i need a fucking bomb.