lonely

i'm thinking about how i'm totally alone in the universe and it sucks. i don't want to be alone, i want to have friends and people that love me. i guess that's just the nature of me...although i guess that's not really my true nature, because it was learned, after all. i am completely alone, and i hate to think about it, but i know i must. it is the truth and i'm done running from the truth. i don't care what it is, i want to face all of my fears--all of them! i want to know every little thing that makes me scared and i want to have a staring showdown deathmatch it. i'm burning all the bridges, so either face me and die or run.

i am completely alone, and i accept that.

the ego perpetuates itself with thoughts...thoughts upon thoughts upon thoughts upon thoughts. it's like we're playing this big game where all we do day and night is try and fill the void in our selves with thought. because the void is there, we just try and cover it up. we're not comfortable with the void for some reason.